Tuesday, December 4

Friends and family.

We are but ships in the night. Yes I come from a family with a useless saying for any situation but friendship is like that, it comes and goes.  I have friends who I would like to ask, what happened? where did our friendship go? why did it stop? I have friends, well they used to be who I know actively avoid me. Life is too hard and what do you say. i have friends who read this blog and I suppose cyber stalk me. I know its You because I can trace your ISP address. Its not difficult you know.  I have friends who pick up from where we left off and I have friends who want to be friends but cant quite do it the way it should be done. I have friends who I don't want as friends either. they are never the ones who decide to live in Australia for some reason. And finally some of my friends are the ships on a Mediterranean cruise following each other from port to port but who never stop still long enough to get together. 
Recently someone I know was commenting 'well Fuck friends' he said, 'thank god for family. They are the ones who stand by you.' Really? I mean REALLY?  We have siblings who live 400 miles away. They never call, write, text or e mail they never contact us apart from a birthday card. They never come and see my children and I don't know why. The hand is extended from this end but never grasped the other and after years of effort Im all done in. The logistics of travelling from one end of the country to the other with 4 kids and me isn't great and the prospect of the difficulty of getting into peoples houses doesn't fill me with excitement either. Various family members spend an inordinate amount of time enjoying ill health. Their thoughts are not with loved ones but themselves, only a few contact us from time to time to see how we are and fewer still come to visit. I am only a bit bitter and twisted by it you will be glad to know,but without doubt I am envious of people who seem to have huge amounts of fantastic friends and jolly family members visiting for fun weekends. 

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