Tuesday, January 30
A Pregnant Pause
I'm fed up. Yes I'm tired of being pregnant, that's it Ive had enough, fast forward to May I think now. I mean when you think about it 9 months must surely be a design fault at least...9 months?!! Seems like Ive been pregnant forever and at the moment I'm looking at the calender and counting the days. Still about 104 to go. I'm spending endless days at home doing endless tasks. Washing, washing and I know, I could do some... washing!!!! Ive done some painting, cleaning and cooking. I'm a Domestic Goddess, no I'm a Bored Domestic Goddess! The weather doesn't help, its that miserable time of year, the garden is beckoning to me, yet it pretty much rains every day, so not much going on there yet.
Mind you even when I'm out its not that much fun. Ive got this awkward bump on my lap that means I cant get comfy, I find hard going terrain VERY hard going, and I don't seem to have the strength I had even before Christmas. I cant bounce up steps anymore, and slopes are getting tough. So I don't enjoy myself much generally. Im a real misery although I look cheerful enough!
I'm having a lot of general discomfort now, I don't like to say pain, but its heading that way. Things are hurting quite a lot more, and Id like to sit in bed a lot. I cant turn myself in bed anymore and end up waking up because Ive been lying too long in the same position and my back is killing me. I cant get out of bed either, or rather it takes me a long time to do so. Having said that I was sat in bed the other night having sort of hysterics, much to the alarm of my husband, " I feel as if I'm sitting on a bag of cobbles" I said, and you know you don't know whether to laugh or cry and that's the truth, Obviously I'm tired.
So please time, hurry up, I want this done and over with and into the summer. Id like to have my life back, so I can make some real future plans, and not just wistful thinking, Id like to be a real person again, and not a pregnant disabled woman. Ooooo I love a label don't you?!