Wednesday, October 11
You're so brave........
Fortunately its been a pretty quiet few days for having to put up with people professing undying admiration for me. I know it makes me sound like a right cow because it gets under my skin a bit, but I'm no saint and being disabled certainly hasn't added to my wonderful personality. For some reason...... and I cannot understand why, acquaintances didn't constantly tell me how wonderful, cheerful, brave, marvellous and generally amazing I was before my SCI. See now I know you find that simply hard to believe, so do I as although I have gained a disability, I'm not sure that Ive also had a personality replacement. I may be being a bit thick but I think I'm pretty much the same as I always was, and that's worrying for everyone! Age has hardly mellowed me. But Ive become more patient with those who do tell me such things and I'm polite and well spoken, although I'm thinking something else completely.
The other thing that has happened is that several people have told me they think I'm going to 'get better' and also not to give up hope and 'they' are doing wonderful things these days. I think I find this even more irritating as it implies Ive given up and am a bloody misery to boot. Its not a question of giving up but lets just be pragmatic here for a minute and take a look at the facts. I have a serious spinal cord injury. I do play it down, but my bladder doesn't work, my bowels are absent minded and I cant walk, so I think thats sort of quite serious. These types of injury do not spontaneously heal, never, ever, ever, as far as I'm concerned... unless someone has been to Lourdes recently anyway. So either I can get over it, and get on with my brilliant life, or I can sit around, wringing my hands, and hoping for a miracle. Hmmmm which is it to be then? A hard choice I know but getting on with life sounds good to me.
So I'm sure in the future we will live in a Star Trek type world whereby most diseases and injuries can be healed, but not yet, its a long way off lets not forget it. And supposing I woke up and found I was on the list for a spinal cord transplant (these don't exist by the way!) by the time it was done, my muscles, tendons and ligaments would be useless and the bones in my lower body would be unable to support me. So No, not in my lifetime, but who knows what will be available for others in the future?