Thursday, May 26
I last saw my dads family when I was about 10. This was thanks to my parents divorce and just how this time went by I don't know, but it did. Funerals are pretty odd occasions at the best of time, but this one was straight out a film. Although my Dads death came as a total shock to me, I had to drop in my wheelchair accessory to my unsuspecting relatives. Its hard and I hate it, you'd think Id be used to it by now but Im not. Id spoken to my aunt about the arrangements and promised in a moment of madness to come in the funeral car with her. Later that evening the light bulb pinged in my head and I realised I wouldn't be able to get in or out the car, so it was a hopeless non starter. Eventually I decided to drop her a note explaining we would meet them there as I would find the car difficult as I didnt want to be chaseing her via call minder for days. Times like this I just want to bang, bang, bang, my head against the wall to be honest.
The funeral was brief and to the point, my dad was rather a minimalist and wanted no fuss. The turn out excellent and I was greeted like the long lost family member I was.
Come and sit at the front, said my cousin. Sweet of him but I declined because there is nothing worse than rolling to the front with everyones eyes drilling into the back of your head. Theres always more room at the back anyway. One of my uncles appeared to be mortified when he met me. Oh what happened to you he asked in a high squeaky shocked voice, are you getting good treatment and I hope you get better soon he said. I smiled, told him I was getting excellent tratement and thanked him because I was feeling bad that he was feeling so bad. I wanted to reassure him. Funny isn't it?
So I am now reacquainted with my family and wonder why it took a lifetime. I remember them all and funnily enough they all seemed to be as I recall them, only we are all grown up. All older and some wiser as well. Perhaps it can be the start of new relationships, I'd like to think so anyway.
Posted by Lo. at 12:54 pm